When I was first told I would need to be on bed rest for 3 days, I was looking forward to it. I was going to get to stay home from work for three days, relax, read, watch tv…whatever I wanted to do. And, it was doctor’s orders. I quickly realized just after about 3 hours that I was not cut out for this. It’s one thing to think you are just going to relax and be lazy all day, but it’s different when you CAN’T do anything else but stay in bed. Plus, Ross works from home and was keeping a close eye on me. I couldn’t even get up to use the restroom without an interrogation from him. He knows me better than I know myself! I thought this would be a piece of cake, but he knew I would try to break the rules and get up more often than I was supposed to. All of a sudden, I was coming up with reasons for why I HAD to get up, when, on a regular weekend, you can hardly get me up and going to do anything.
The day I got home, my bestie brought over lunch and hung out for a few hours. My parents came over that first night and made dinner for us. The next day, another good friend brought lunch and stayed for several hours as we visited and planned a baby shower for a mutual friend. The last day of bed rest, my best friend flew to Houston to stay the weekend and support us by walking with us in a fertility Walk for Hope that we had signed up to be a part of. My cousin stopped my with her kids and we were able to visit a while. Again, the support we were already receiving was so humbling to me. It was a great encouragement to know how many people love and care for us.
Finally Saturday came and I was FREE!! I had a list of things that I needed to do and had a great friend by my side and was able to check things off my to-do list. That afternoon, her husband came into town and we were able to spend a great afternoon together. It is such a blessing that our husbands get along so well. It was really a requirement since Dana and I had been the best of friends since we were 5 years old. Ross’ cousin and his sweet wife arrived at our house just in time for all of us to go to dinner. We had a great time that night and woke up early Sunday morning for the walk.
It was just a 1 mile walk, but the purpose of the walk was to bring awareness to the very real struggle of fertility. 1 in 8 couples in the US face the struggle of infertility, however, it is still not talked about as openly. I’m sure there are a lot of reasons for that. I feel like for a lot of people there is a sense of shame or embarrassment when they are unable to conceive. It is also very personal for many people and they may feel uncomfortable sharing about their struggle.
Another couple we are very good friends with also attended the walk with their sweet kiddos. Ross and I had a team there of 8 people.
We finished the walk, had lunch, and then people headed their separate ways to finish their weekends. I was looking forward to going back to work the next day and getting settled into my routine again. There is something so reassuring to feel like I have at least a little bit of control over something. With IVF, you really have to give over just about all control to the doctors, nurses and lab technicians. I love what I do and truly enjoy the teenagers and families I work with. My colleagues are the best, and I’m not just saying that because some of them might be reading this…its true!
Back into a routine, the days quickly flew by. I was busy later that weekend, as Ross’ parents were in town visiting. I also had a baby shower to host that Sunday. It was a whirlwind. Monday and Tuesday flew by and then, it was the day. Wednesday April 29th, just last week, was the pregnancy test. I woke up and took a home pregnancy test. It was negative. I was not really sure what to think. I knew there was still a very real chance I could be pregnant. That did not keep me from freaking out. Twice, Ross had to come to our room as I sat crying and worrying about what was to come. I got myself together and made it to the doctor’s office for my blood test. I was in and out very quickly and on my way to work. I was a jumble of nerves and knew they would be calling with the results early that afternoon.
I had a hard time keeping things together at work that morning. Luckily, I was on the phone with insurance companies all morning. This is usually a task I look forward to the least. It is definitely not my favorite part of the job, but I was thankful for it that day. I was able to close my door and sit on hold most of the morning. I had privacy and it was okay if I let my composure falter a bit now and then.
I finished my phone calls just before noon. I called my mom and suggested we meet for lunch, but that we pick something up and meet at my house in case I couldn’t keep my emotions in check. I had just arrived home with lunch and Ross met me in the kitchen. We had been talking for just a few minutes when my phone rang.
It was the nurse and she had the results.